Lewes Forum thread

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Young dads

On 15 May 2008 at 8:51pm madge wrote:

I have just read a post from damon under the thread REVENGE IS SWEET. I have a lot of sympathy for the young men in these teenage relationships. So often these young girls deliberately get pregnant by these lads who have more testosterin than brain. You only hear about the lads who walk away without a backward glance, there are many lads heartbroken at not being able to see or bond with the resulting children when the relationships inevitably go wrong.

On 15 May 2008 at 8:52pm madge wrote:

sorry I meant see under PAY BACK TIME thread.

On 20 May 2008 at 9:51pm Annette Curtin-Twitcher wrote:

If the lads don't want to be dads, they should take steps to prevent it! It takes two to conceive, the boys are just as responsible as the girls for the consequences.

On 20 May 2008 at 10:29pm madge wrote:

Yes Annette I totally agree but when they both make the mistake sadly it can often end up that the young men who want to take responsibility for their child & bond with them that are denied this right. The girl may simply decide they dont want the guy after all & treat the child as a 'possession' denying the father any access or input which is heartbreaking & also very sad for the child too.

On 21 May 2008 at 9:28am Bitter Experience wrote:

Too true Madge, and its not just the young girls who do that. My wife, and numerous other'caring' mums I know of have left their husbands and assumed that the children are somehow their possession to do with as they want, and that the fathers relationship with them does not matter. Unfortunately the law and the whole benefit system supports them in this attitude as well. Why should a girl/woman have the right to dictate when their children can see their father just because they themselves dont want to, and at the same time take the fathers money/possessions/home so that they can live a comfortable life themselves ?

On 21 May 2008 at 4:29pm madge wrote:

Unfortunately like everything else until we see it happening to someone close we dont appreciate the pain this causes. The months wasted trying to gain some form of reasonable regular access must be soul destroying for all men. Its a disgrace that these bitter women young or older can hold the child to ransom against a man who wants to see his child. Some men walk on eggshells knowing at any time they may be denied regular arranged access just because the woman want to or because it doesnt suit their own plans that week. It is tragic.