On 18 Dec 2017 at 2:36pm LewesPerson1 wrote:
Someone just got assaulted at the station. I'd just crossed over the bridge so was just out of being able to see/help what was happening but could hear a woman screaming for someone to 'Please stop it' shortly followed by one of the train station employees shouting 'Stop that man'.
I hope the lady involved is ok and just a warning to others to be careful.
I'm abhorred that some people think this is acceptable behaviour in this day and age and especially in the UK. The station was fairly busy (including the regular cider drinkers sitting on the bench outside) so for someone to try and get away with something in broad daylight with a lot of witnesses around is even more beyond me.
On 18 Dec 2017 at 2:57pm Billy wrote:
It was a domestic! Started on the train from Brighton to Hastings. Christmas shopping gone wrong and then turned into argument over a mobile phone which she wanted to use.
On 18 Dec 2017 at 5:32pm Pedant wrote:
LewesPerson1 if you are 'abhorred that some people think this is acceptable behaviour in this day and age and especially in the UK' when in history do you think it would be okay and in which other country?
On 18 Dec 2017 at 5:52pm LewesPerson1 wrote:
@Pedant I wasn't stating that I thought it was acceptable behaviour at a certain time/other country, more denoting the point in time that our society has evolved too. We are the most educated population in our countries history (even if it doesn't always feel like it) with behavioural skills being taught from a young age and also one of the higher educated countries in the world.
On 18 Dec 2017 at 6:34pm Billy wrote:
The teaching of behavioural skills is no substitute for good parenting from within a stable family.
On 18 Dec 2017 at 9:19pm Sensible wrote:
Isn't it best not to interfere with a "domestic" because in fact it's seen as a private matter? Usually provoked by something an outsider wouldn't be expected to understand.
On 19 Dec 2017 at 5:12am Billy wrote:
But also LewesPerson1, the behaviour you observed is actually quite common in the real world.
On 19 Dec 2017 at 8:46am Annette Curtin-Twitcher wrote:
A "domestic" is NOT a private matter, even when it occurs in the home.
There are still almost 2 women a week killed by partners or ex-partners in the UK, which is why the police here attend all reported domestic assaults or threatened assaults. There are also thousands of people living in fear because of domestic abuse.
Please don't belittle what is a very real and relatively common social problem that affects thousands of families. Nearly a third of women have experienced some form of domestic abuse.
I hope someone helped this woman, and that they didn't all just try and ignore it.
On 19 Dec 2017 at 9:22am Feline wrote:
Here here ACT.
On 19 Dec 2017 at 9:44am Billy wrote:
OMG, were you there? Did you see what happened? Did you see who started it? Did you see who was the victim and who was the aggressor? Immediately you all assume the female was the victim. How Sexist is that?
On 19 Dec 2017 at 10:22am Deja Vu wrote:
@Billy, it's extremely sexist, 40% of domestic abuse is against men.
As far as I can see there is no suggestion of assault or abuse, other than Lewesperson assuming it was due to "shouting".
If I was having a domestic (rare) in a public place (extremely rare but it does happen) I wouldn't thank a rail employee for sticking his nose in.
Yes my wife does abuse me (only on special occasions).
On 19 Dec 2017 at 10:59am Pervy Pete wrote:
I was abused by a woman last week. I'm going again on Thursday.
On 19 Dec 2017 at 11:21am Pedro wrote:
@deja vu - you are correct on one thing - the majority of domestic abuse victims are indeed women, and its clear from the OP that they witnessed voices from the incident that would suggest the abuser was male in this case so the comments that followed are in no way sexist. We should not trivialise domestic abuse, irrespective of the gender of the victim or abuser, which you appear to be doing with crass jokes and creating a tedious gender argument (randomly crying sexism) as pure distraction from the incident itself. People in public have every right to intervene in public disputes if they feel there is a danger of it escalating and can manage to help safely and effectively.
On 19 Dec 2017 at 11:34am Billy wrote:
Pedro, did you see what happened?
On 19 Dec 2017 at 11:46am Pedro wrote:
@ Billy - I wasn't there, I read the account of the original poster as I stated above. What is utterly unnecessary is some indignant gender debate, or trivialising domestic abuse which is where this thread was starting to head.
People were reported to be screaming/shouting - and as far as I'm concerned, in public, this should be diffused as soon as possible, as it can create wider distress, as well as helping any victims involved. Irrespective of their gender.
On 19 Dec 2017 at 12:05pm Deja Vu wrote:
Pedro I'm correct on the 4 things I mention not 1, which points are incorrect exactly?
1. 40% of men are the victims (not necessarily abused by women)
2. There was no suggestion of abuse or assault (other than the op assuming so)
3. If a couple of having a row it's no one else's business until the (so called) abused wife complains of abuse
4. My wife abuses me on special occasions
On 19 Dec 2017 at 12:18pm Pedro wrote:
@ deja vu - yea, so you're stating a fact that the majority of victims of domestic violence are women. Not sure how this is particularly relevant in this thread, you seem to just want to start a debate about domestic abuse and gender.
To say there was "no suggestion" of abuse or assault is a bit of a stretch and disingenuous. Of course there is SOME suggestion of it, given that someone was reported to have screamed "please stop it!" and another person added by shouting "stop that man!" which has prompted the thread in the first place - any one with a modicum of intelligence would not rule out the potential for some sort of abuse. Does it have to get to the point where someone is hacking another down with an axe before it becomes "abuse" in your eyes?
As I said before - if a couple or anyone else is having a supposedly "private" argument in public, and it gets very vocal and this concerns other people in close proximity to them, then they have every right to intervene and step in before it escalates further.
On 19 Dec 2017 at 12:50pm Deja Vu wrote:
Yes there was some suggestion of it, but it was immediately quashed by Billy who I assume DID witness it, I guess we'll find out soon enough...
But my comments are in response to a "domestic" not "domestic abuse", so I'm really not sure how saying I don't even think it happened and the OP is mistaken is turning the thread into a debate about abuse.
The gender debate is relevant because (if you had read the thread) you'll see that it HAS been assumed by some that victim was the women and the man was the aggressor (despite the fact.
Bit of a joke that from the OP's description in your heads it happened and the bloke did it, the OP clearly says he witnessed nothing.
On 19 Dec 2017 at 1:19pm Pedro wrote:
The OP said they didn't see it, but could hear station staff shout "stop that man" - that gives us some context, if not the full picture. If it were just a "domestic", then why would it escalate to the point where a woman is heard screaming "please stop it", and station staff intervening and calling to stop that man. It seems reasonable to suggest at this point that it was an incident of some concern at least, no? Even if its a breach of the peace and nothing more sinister.
Either way, this kind of disruptive behaviour in public, whoever it may be, does not have to be tolerated and interventions are more than acceptable should it diffuse a noisy domestic argument, abuse or whatever you wish to label it.
Its unnecessary to launch a gender debate in this thread (granted, its an important topic that certainly demands attention elsewhere, but this is not the place). You've turned it into one as you think this is some sort of attack on the male species, which it clearly isn't, and your paranoia is simply manifesting itself with your indignation and phoney cries of sexism.
On 19 Dec 2017 at 2:12pm Deja Vu wrote:
Don't be silly Pedro, your argument is based 100% on assumptions (as is mine I admit).
A woman shouting "Please stop it" at her partner gives no context at all and who's to say the station staff didn't make exactly the same assumption as you and shouted "stop that man" for no good reason?
After reading the OP I was concerned, after reading Billy's reply I wasn't.
I didn't launch the gender debate, read up.
None of us know what happened, the OP didn't witness it, Billy reply is rather emphatic to the suggestion it was assault "It was a domestic!".
Seems like I might not be the paranoid one after all eh Pedro, maybe a little less dope in future?
On 19 Dec 2017 at 2:25pm Pedro wrote:
@ deja vu - its not based on "100% assumption", and frankly I don't find Billy to be at all credible as a poster on this forum let alone as an arbiter or witness to a domestic incident, so I have doubts that a) he is even talking about the same incident or b) that even if it was, there still was a reasonable need for intervention in order to prevent a breach of the peace. Like I've already said, I don't care whether it was a man or woman either way, but I think its perfectly reasonable to assume the possibility of antisocial behaviour at the very least - which means any external intervention is welcomed. The OP went out of their way to report on here an incident they felt sounded hostile enough - and I just hope it was resolved peacefully.
Bringing cannabis into the discussion? How very original of you. Should I enquire how much you have been drinking lately? (given that alcohol impairs judgement far more).
On 19 Dec 2017 at 2:36pm Billy wrote:
Pedro, you are laughable. OK, so I didn't witness a couple alighting the 14:20 train from Brighton to Seaford on platform 3 at Lewes. I didn't see the man (mid twenties, long hair, beard, Parka). I didn't see him holding the hand of a little girl. I didn't see a hysterical mum with baby in buggy wanting to use thr mans phone. I didn't hear her shouting to the little girl "don't listen to your Dad". I didn't see the man go up the steps from platform 3. I didn't see the mum going up the ramp pushing her buggy. I didn't hear her shouting for phone again when she got to top of ramp.
Shouting always sounds louder in an empty train station and it is easy to think that a murder might have taken place.
On 19 Dec 2017 at 3:13pm Deja Vu wrote:
I don't drink Pedro, I smoke cannabis (another incorrect assumption by you).
On 19 Dec 2017 at 3:18pm Pedro wrote:
@ Billy, you can't be sure you are referring to the same incident as the OP, and while incidents like what you state do occur, there is no harm in others intervening if it sounds like its becoming a bit hostile or just plainly disrupting to other passengers. Also, I assume you heard the station staff member shouting "stop that man" - what was that about if you were an eye witness?
On 19 Dec 2017 at 3:20pm Pedro wrote:
@ Deja Vu - you also don't know how much cannabis I use compared with you, so you are making your own assumptions. I only mentioned alcohol, because your comment was just a random personal attack that had little relevance to the thread.
On 19 Dec 2017 at 3:31pm Billy wrote:
Pedro, the original poster, admits they were unable to see! Can you be sure the shouts of "stop that man" were not in respect of a separate fare evasion incident. Some of the responses on this thread are typical of people today jumping on the bandwagon, speculating, and spreading fake news. Only comment when you know the facts.
On 19 Dec 2017 at 3:52pm Pedro wrote:
Yes, Billy - it crossed my mind that it COULD be connected to someone who dodged a fair, but seems to be unlikely given the timing with what the OP heard. Nobody is spreading "fake news" - as nobody knows the people (no names or details given) involved and its not reported as an incident beyond a discussion point on an anonymous forum. You're beginning to sound like Donald Trump, which I guess is where we find your credibility goes further downhill
Its perfectly reasonable to discuss the OP's experience though. They said the station was relatively busy, you say it was quiet....I'm thinking that the station on the run up to christmas mid-afternoon (post lunchtime) would be relatively busy and not an "empty train station" as you worded it. I'm not accusing anyone of anything, but its perfectly reasonable to discuss this. Its sort of what forums are about.
On 19 Dec 2017 at 3:53pm Deja Vu wrote:
Bored now Pedro, not even sure why you're still arguing.
Thank you for the rare moment of clarity on the Lewes forums Billy.
On 19 Dec 2017 at 4:58pm pipe down wrote:
Bored now Deja, looks like you didn't read the initial comment. Fair assumptions by pedro but you just couldn't help try to aggravate. This one's on you
On 19 Dec 2017 at 5:01pm Hamid Barr wrote:
Pedro still droning on I see.
Always read his burblings in the voice of Donald Duck. Sometimes in the voice of Donald Duck after he's had a large dose of helium.
Either way gives the gravitas it deserves.
On 19 Dec 2017 at 5:08pm Good Grief wrote:
There was an incident at the station. Billy saw an incident at the station. It’s a reasonable bet that it was the same incident. Pedro meanwhile wasn’t there at all, but even without knowing the first thing about it, he still likes to think that HE knows more about what did or didnt happen, and tries to discredit other people with differing opinions by trying to discredit them in other ways. He then has the temerity to accuse other posters of being Trump-like!
How exactly would he have intervened on such an incident? I would love to know.
On 19 Dec 2017 at 5:30pm Deja Vu wrote:
@Pipe down, which part didn't I read?
1. The assault that wasn't an assault?
2. The assailant that wasn't and assailant?
3. The witness that wasn't a witness?
Maybe the bloke was running away before the woman started a big argument on the train station?
Maybe the woman abuses both the bloke and the children?
On 19 Dec 2017 at 6:29pm Pedro wrote:
Jeez, I am getting attacked for simply pointing out that this thread shouldn't morph into a needless and inappropriate gender/sexism row, or trivialise domestic abuse because of a couple of insecure men who think the world is against their gender. The thread still ended up a storm of the brown stuff with or without my help. *sigh*
On 19 Dec 2017 at 6:41pm Staying in wrote:
^ deluded druggie
On 19 Dec 2017 at 8:03pm Yawn wrote:
This is all very tedious...
On 20 Dec 2017 at 2:06pm Theresa's Philip wrote:
Only Americans call it a "train Station"
On 20 Dec 2017 at 4:11pm Idiots wrote:
amazing how a thread asking about an assault turns into an argument about whether or not the male was at fault. The people getting in a huff about "assumptions" that it was the male at fault are the same people who get in a huff about how easily "offended" people are these days and how they seem to want to start arguments all the time. Hypocritical no? The topic wasn't about all men being evil and always the abusers, the topic was simply about a witnessed assault that entailed a woman shouting "stop it" to a man, and the said man then being chased. It's almost like you're looking for a political argument about gender for the sake of it.