On 12 Dec 2008 at 6:21pm The wife of Lopster wrote:
I've now realise after 17 years of marrage that Lopster has finally done my head in. He is in need of a new home.
He is house trained, occasionally washes up and picks up after himself, honest, hard working, makes a good salad,very inteligent but lacks common sense, laughs at his own jokes and if you havent got any kids you will have one if you take him on. His best quality is that he is bloody good at ironing. So if you need a big kid that can iron and make salads in the summer then please leave your details.
On 12 Dec 2008 at 11:15pm Friend of Lopster wrote:
He also makes a roast beast lunch for five most Sundays, plays a mean game of backgammon, is generous with his time, loyal, dependable, supportive, discrete, always ready to listen to a mate, has a great sense of humour, would do anything for his kids, likes to snuggle, enjoys movies, beer, cheese, walks on the beach, gazing at stars, night time electric storms, music, games, reading, good food, good company and blowing his own trumpet (ooh err)
On 13 Dec 2008 at 5:16am Lopsters dog wrote:
Well i like him too....woof woof !!!
On 13 Dec 2008 at 10:40am Ebayer wrote:
place him on ebay??
Start the bidding now you could put a buy it now on him and you could also put free delivery do a three day auction then the lucky winner will have him in time for christmas.
why not also place a ad in the free ads on this great site.
On 13 Dec 2008 at 12:58pm Keira wrote:
How shall I leave my bid - sealed brown envelope?
On 13 Dec 2008 at 1:00pm Kylie wrote:
Love it if you could ship him to Oz for me andmy sister to share
On 13 Dec 2008 at 1:02pm Kate wrote:
wow -wow-wow- wow WOW Unbelieveable
been waiting years for such a great offer - would love him to be part of my life - advise me of Keira's bid and I'll top it!!!
such a great guy...
On 13 Dec 2008 at 1:05pm Fan of Lopster wrote:
I have never met him but he sounds so nice...I'll start the bidding at £10.And seeing as it's the season of goodwill I will let you borrow my name E Bayer.
On 13 Dec 2008 at 1:30pm The Real E Bayer. wrote:
You'll need to give a few details though...How many previous owners.miles on the clock,how much he would cost to run etc...
On 13 Dec 2008 at 2:43pm Gorringes wrote:
I'll start the bidding at £100,000
On 13 Dec 2008 at 7:29pm Lopster wrote:
do I get a say in this?
On 13 Dec 2008 at 7:41pm wife of lopster wrote:
You have no say Lopster! YOUR OUT ASAP!!!!
On 13 Dec 2008 at 8:09pm Anon wrote:
Is this really serious?? If It is,and I did this to my other half on a public forum,I would be wearing my monitor as a face mask....
On 13 Dec 2008 at 9:17pm north carolina girl wrote:
well, he'd have a nice home here in north carolina. he would have to learn how to like southern fried chicken, collard greens and cream gravy, of course. if he complains, he can always go roost with my chickens. ; D
On 14 Dec 2008 at 12:54pm wife of lopster wrote:
Hi NCG, i think he's really taken with your offer. Chicken and gravy are his favourites when he's over in the states. Can i ship him to you?
Hi anon, my husband knows im doing this thread but as for wearing a monitor on my face, there's more chance of me doing it to him ;-)) xx
On 14 Dec 2008 at 12:58pm Lopster wrote:
The States would be a good option - still holding out for more news from Kylie and her sister though as it would be nice to go down under with them (ooh err) - NCG sounds like every day is a Shoney's day - I could get used to that - fresh eggs too!!
On 14 Dec 2008 at 1:33pm north carolina girl wrote:
dear lopster, and wife of lopster,
it would be very nice to have two husbands.....can you image, all the DIY that would be accomplished by them! and then, they could both escort me out for a walk on the beach.
yes, we do love the fresh eggs. country life does indeed have its little perks.
i do realise you've had other very special offers, so i shall be happy to wait here in the queue, whilst you consider your options.
OH! how are you at gardening? you'd have to be pretty good at it, though i would worry that you might not exactly be keen to work outside in the high humidity of our summers.
of course, you would need to bring in the firewood for the winter months, too.
y'all come back now, ya heah?
have a nice day,
north carolina girl
On 14 Dec 2008 at 4:28pm wife of lopster wrote:
Forget lopster NCG, i want to come and live with you. I am good at all the above LOL x
On 14 Dec 2008 at 8:28pm north caroina girl wrote:
hehe! now there's an interesting option!
On 14 Dec 2008 at 11:56pm Wife of Lopster wrote:
It is the 21st Century anything should be possible -lol
On 15 Dec 2008 at 12:34pm local town resident wrote:
I think therefore that whilst you are considering your options you should be thinking more broadly. Why not hire a float at next years gay pride in Brighton, and offer Lopster in a fund raising 'slave auction' That way you raise money for a good cause, he will go to someone who wants him, and he will get to meet new people who, if stupid cliches are true, will have a lovely kitchen for him to cook his Sunday Roast in.
On 15 Dec 2008 at 3:18pm wife of lopster wrote:
Excellent idea LTR :-)
On 15 Dec 2008 at 5:42pm Latte wrote:
I'll take him off your hands love, i hate doing the soddin ironing!!!
On 15 Dec 2008 at 6:26pm wife of lopster wrote:
Latte he's yours, come and pick him up, you know were i live.
On 15 Dec 2008 at 6:53pm Latte wrote:
What do mean pick him up??? blimey, haven't you heard of home delivery?? Oh by the way, is he on home approval? obviously i'd like a guarantee i can return if he's not up to scratch...... :-)
On 15 Dec 2008 at 10:30pm Wife of lopster wrote:
I can give you him on 30 day home approval.
On 16 Dec 2008 at 6:43am Latte wrote:
That sounds very reasonable wife of Lopster......
On 16 Dec 2008 at 8:01pm Lopster wrote:
Faaarrrrt - oopssorry - belch - ooops and again - wheeze wheeze
On 17 Dec 2008 at 1:26pm Latte wrote:
Hmmmmm....i'm thinking i could have been slightly hasty with my decision regarding this arrangement,!!!!! lol
On 17 Dec 2008 at 8:07pm Geoff wrote:
Have you thought about putting him in storage? That way you could wait until the recession is over, and get a better offer.
On 18 Dec 2008 at 8:48am Lauren wrote:
I'll have him, for a cup of tea and a packet of crisps.
On 18 Dec 2008 at 3:32pm wife of lopster wrote:
Good idea Geoff. And as for LAUREN, he's yours 8-))
On 18 Dec 2008 at 10:46pm Lopster wrote:
where? when? are you Kylie, Kate or keira material? but then again who cares - as long as you can make me laugh and share walks, star-gazing, movies, holidays, music, food and fun I'll be happy - was looking forward to Oz though - or North Carolina (I like fresh eggs) - ho hum - tea and Cheese'n'Onion here I come
On 18 Dec 2008 at 11:47pm Relieved wrote:
Thank God that Lauren and Wife of Lopster have finally seen sense.
On 20 Dec 2008 at 8:11pm Lopster wrote:
Lauren am still awaiting details of address, or collection? will you be sending instructions or a ticket maybe? I can drive to yours if you send me a postcode for my trusty TomTom?